Recently, I went to a friend’s house to celebrate Labor Day and just relax, listen to music and enjoy good food. I arrived with a friend of mine for comfort, since I didn’t know anyone else there except for the host. The environment was mainly family of the host so me and my friend (both single 25 year old young women) were pretty much like fresh meat for young men there, if interested. We are used to this at big gatherings, but its all fun mingling at the end of the day.

Although things started to take a turn. As entertaining as it was, it made me think. Okay so there was one young man in particular at this gathering who was single and in his late twenties and about four of his family members were pretty much trying to encourage me and my friend to get to know him better! It was serious. But the way the family and also the young man were going about it was all wrong, in my opinion. They were very aggressive. “You should get to know him! He’s a nurse! He’s a nurse! You know he’s a nurse right?” the family repeated. 

The young man himself gave his name, age, occupation, hobbies list, occupation, occupation, occupation, and guess what else? His occupation! He works in the medical field and the position he’s in traditionally brings in a nice income. Though, I felt he was forcing his lifestyle upon us way too much. Now some could say, “Maybe he was trying to impress you?” Well he already told me about his career five times before finding out where I earn my income from.

It just sparked a thought in my mind that some people place judgement among women who only date men for money or their lifestyle. Yet where do we get this mindset? If I wasn’t so stern about my own values for myself, I would’ve easily gave in and said “Okay, here’s my number, call me so we can talk more about your job and you spend your money on me”. I mean ultimately that’s what he was giving off. If a ‘gold digger’ or ‘groupie’ was in the room, he was giving a bright green light to go for him for the wrong reasons.

My purpose of this post is a message not only for women but also for men.

Women: As women we hold different values and morals. Although we all deserve to be treated like queens.

We all deserve to have a voice. We all deserve equality. Never allow anyone to make you get out of your comfort zone for their pleasure. It’s not worth it. Example: This young man and his family were constantly throwing HIS job and HIS money down our throat. For what? Material things don’t attract me. A hardworking man? Yes I love that but its all about balance.

Men: Women love a manly man. I personally am attracted to very ambitious, hardworking men. But before you tell me about your paycheck, how about you entice me to like YOU. Mentioning your occupation is not a problem by far. If the woman want to know more, feel free to share what you want. Just be careful not to come off as either a workaholic or a new ATM for her. Because the wrong type of woman would’ve taken advantage of this guy I am speaking of.

I say all of this to say, don’t be so quick to judge a ‘gold-digger’ or a money hungry woman. I am not condoning it but, if you throw something in someone’s face so much, their going to eventually reach if they don’t have enough will power. So ladies be careful on what you accept and men be careful how you come off to females.

❤ Yours Truly,

Winnie C.