Happily ever after

I’ll be happy once I’m over you
I’ll be glad when I forget you
You wouldn’t expect to be living in perfect bliss
Then all of a sudden it’s all dismissed
Living in the moment
Being guided by my heart
Is where I went wrong from the start
Why make me so happy to end up making me so miserable
Why build me up into thinking it was all a dream
Now it feels like a never ending nightmare
I’m pissed I’m pissed about it
I’ll be glad when I’m indifferent about it
Me being pissed means I care
When I walk away I want you to chase me
I need the strength to walk away without looking back
I need my heart to fall into a coma and forget those happy moments
Forget those wonderful things we did for each other
Forget those songs that remind me of you
I never imagined wanting to forget you
I couldn’t imagine life without you
But I haven’t been happy since you made me happy
You brought me joy then broke my heart
I feel like I saw the calm before the storm
Where everything is unreal and perfect
When I would sit back and look at us and smile that you always made me happy
That’s when I fell
Fell in love
It seemed like a fantasy
I was living the happily
Dreaming of the EVER AFTER
But now I’m experiencing EVER AFTER
During the happily is never ending smiles
Laughs
Hugs
Sweet little nothings
THE EVER
Is when you wonder
How did this EVER happen?
How did we end up so perfect?
I know we will never EVER end.
But this AFTER
this AFTER can kill you if you’re not prepared
I don’t think I can be happy after this ever.
Let me repeat
After experiencing HAPPILY EVER AFTER
I can’t be HAPPY AFTER THIS EVER
it’s crazy how things can change so abruptly
And all advice is to move on
All advice is to say f*** him
No matter how bitter I may feel now
He once brought me happiness I never felt and probably won’t feel again
He brought me joy I didn’t think was possible
He made me smile without even trying
He programmed my heart to beat faster at the thought of him
To pound harder at the sight of him
Without love you don’t know how to hate
Though I can’t quite seem to hate who I thought was brought to me by fate

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